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| Decisions ... |
| Friday, June 26, 2009 |
Today is the start of the day of me, having to make the most difficult decision..
To stay in this current job, or to change over to another job ...
This job has offered big and clear opportunity, while the other job offers stable income every month .. but know not how long will it last...
Don't know how to choose as it is not easy, judging on the current situation i am in..
Have been wondering since last Sunday, after YN told me about the job offer..
Don't know if it will really be true this time, or will there be another delay ..
Should i give up this current job, or should i stay on with it?
Gosh it is really tough ...
Happy days and sad days passes by real quick ..
Had a big argument last night, hate it much when my privacy is being trespassed ..
Why can't people just understand what it meant by privacy?
It is just plain simple word, its my thing, means no touchy touchy .. is it that hard to understand?
Peoples nowadays .. haiz ... real big time and ended it with warnings given out ..
If you wanna see the consequences, try it on again ... lets see if you have the guts to accept the consequence of breaking the ultimate rule .. hehee ...
Had a nice jamming session with the band ... haha ..
Played I Will Bless The Lord - True Worshippers, The Time Has Come, and also 21 Guns - GreenDay ..
Guess what, 21 guns was the best that we did out of the 3 songs...
The singing, the music, the flow of song and the tempo .. everything went so well ...
LOL...
Anyway, am glad that it has started ..
Finally, my dream of having an own band, is becoming more and more realistic ..
hahaha ....
Well, That's All Folks ..
Til the next time ... hehehe ...
-outz- |
posted by Billyism @ 10:08 AM  |
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| Intoxication in Life |
| Sunday, June 21, 2009 |
I came to realise, life isn't as easy at it seems.
Happens that so many things to be done, so many tough decisions to make ..
Got an offer from YN to help out with his company, as a tech support.
Well, i am do interested in that job, after all, its my own specialty.
But i have to admit, i am rusty d, after so long never do it .. HAHA..
At the same time, am thinking about my current job ..
Yes, it is a tough job to earn money, but hey, where is it that is easy after all?
Since i have to start from scratch all over again after my downfall last year ..
This job has offer me big career opportunity, something we can't get from outside ..
Only this is have to sacrifice time for now, to achieve goals in time to come...
But then, in life, to achieve something, we do have to sacrifice something.
Such as now, i am sacrificing my time for my work.
Worked 7 days this week, trying to cover back the lost i made for the past 2 weeks.
It is very tiring, but surprisingly, here i am, still blogging .. LOLZ!!!
Perhaps i have not been blogging for a few days, so very itchy hand now d ..
HAHA...
Well, yesterday was Father's Day.. Didn't even got the chance to wish my own dad..
Sadly .. LOLZ!!!
So, would like to make a shout out in here to him .. "HEY DAD, HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!"
(not that he hears or knows... ROFL!!)
Did a skit in church for the fathers in HCC..
Was quite fun, though i don't have much a role in there.
Enjoyed myself though .. hehehe ..
Ended up lots of ppl asking, "Why is it not using a pretty girl but you?"
LOLZ!!
The kids of HCC did a well job too. Credits to them, playing the song Eyes of the Father.. LOL..
Changed lyrics of course .. job well done ... kids .. :P
Okay peeps, gtg now...
Sleeping time .. :P
-outz- |
| posted by Billyism @ 8:47 AM |
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| New Divide - Linkin Park |
| Wednesday, June 17, 2009 |
I remembered black skies
The lightning all around me
I remembered each flash
As time began to blur
Like a startling sign
That fate had finally found me
And your voice was all I heard
That I get what I deserve
So give me reason
To prove me wrong
To wash this memory clean
Let the floods cross the distance in your eyes
Give me reason
To fill this hole
Connect the space between
Let it be enough to reach the truth that lies
Across this new divide
There was nothing in sight
But memories left abandoned
There was nowhere to hide
The ashes fell like snow
And the ground caved in
Between where we were standing
And your voice was all I heard
That I get what I deserve
So give me reason
To prove me wrong
To wash this memory clean
Let the floods cross the distance in your eyes
Across this new divide
In every loss
In every lie
In every truth that you'd deny
And each regret
And each goodbye
Was a mistake to great to hide
And your voice was all I heard
That I get what I deserve
So give me reason
To prove me wrong
To wash this memory clean
Let the floods cross the distance in your eyes
Give me reason
To fill this hole
Connect the space between
Let it be enough to reach the truth that lies
Across this new divide
Across this new divide
Across this new divide
Another AWESOME SONG!! Linkin Park will always be the best group in my list ..
Don't know why, but am always attached to their albums ..
Had almost all of their songs, even those that are not released .. LOL..
Remembered when i was to do my college DW 4.0, i chose Linkin Park as my subject ...
hahaha .. wondering where's the programme now also i don't know ...
Anyway, enjoy the lyrics .. :P |
| posted by Billyism @ 7:32 AM |
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| 21 Guns - Green Day |
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Do you know what's worth fighting for
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?
Does the pain weigh out the pride?
And you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside?
You're in ruins...
One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky
You and I
When you're at the end of the road
And you lost all sense of control
And your thoughts have taken their toll
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul
Your faith walks on broken glass
And the hangover doesn't pass
Nothing's ever built to last
You're in ruins
One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky
You and I
Did you try to live on your own
When you burned down the house and home?
Did you stand too close to the fire?
Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone
When it's time to live and let die
And you can't get another try
Something inside this heart has died
You're in ruins
One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky
You and I
Gosh am totally in love with this song ... the tempo and lyrics suits me real well ..
Thanks to Jason for introducing this song to me ..
Am quite addicted to it .. must listen at least 3 4 times a day .. LOLZ!!
It is in both my phones .. so can listen anywhere, anytime ... HEHEHE!!! |
| posted by Billyism @ 7:30 AM |
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| Life, Oh Life .... |
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Hello there ppl ...
Fuh ... finally today i got to come back early ...
Tiring day i had today, went to do B2B ... climbing up and down stairs of 3 and 4 stories buildings since morning til bout 4pm ...
Been so long since i last did all those exercise .. hehee ...
Had a wonderful time today..
Enjoyed myself, though its very tiring ... lolz .. but nevertheless, am glad that it ended well today ... hehehe ...
After 2 days of not making any sales, finally i made a few today.
All praises to God for His grace and mercy and provision of my needs, at the right timing .. :)
Downloaded New Divide by Linkin Park, Transformers - Rolling on The Floor (HAHAHA... its actually Revenge of The Fallen = ROTF) Soundtrack .. hehehe ...
Enjoyed everybit of the song.. Linkin Park is Linkin Park after all .. hehehe ...
Besides that, since am so free today as i came home early, hehe .. tried to sing 21 Guns by Green Day ..
Wondering if the mic problem or do i really sound awful for this song ... LOLZ!!
Nevertheless, this is 1 of the songs that i will be jamming with my band next week, if the jamming session is confirmed ..
What's worse, i might have to sing!!! HAHAHA!!!
Was listening to Skillet - Comatose last Saturday, though dear lui lui said the song is noisy .. hehehe ..
Well, enjoyed myself with those songs after so long never listen to it .. :P
Am even listening to it now as i am blogging .. HAHA...
Am now downloading Hillsong United's latest album, Tear Down The Walls 2009 ..
Should be finishing soon .. hehe ... wonder if its good ..:P
Though i know i should not support piracy, but hey, this is my expertise man .. HAHAHA...
Sorry Hillsong United .. :P
For the 1st time ever since i joined this company, seeing Adrian, my leader, losing his temper ..
He's a very cool and chill guy, but unbelievable today, he exploded on everyone out in our team meeting this morning ... LOLZ!!
And also, another colleague, Finas, who has always been bery quiet, even voiced out today..
Its like a ... WOW!!! to everyone ... lol .. never expect anything from him, but suddenly .. hehehe ...
Alright, wanna go get ready for bed now, and continue my war tomorrow.
Take care peeps .. :)
Until the next blog .. hehehe ... :P
-outz- |
| posted by Billyism @ 6:04 AM |
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| Busy Life Again .. |
| Monday, June 15, 2009 |
Hello once again.. Finally have time to blog ..
Well went back to work today. Though don't feel like, but have to. LOLZ! Had a decent welcome back in office in the morning and things went kinda smoothly, till when we left to go to the event ground.
Was on the highway, overtaking a car.. To my surprise, there's a speedtrap right in front after i cut out.. Hopefully don't get any summons from there..
Besides that, had a troublesome colleague who just love to give trouble to everyone. Thanks to her both mine and adrian's day is spoiled. Acting as though she's boss, while she's no higher rank than me. And to make things worse, when we reached parking, she opened my car door so wide that it bang the pillar next to my car. On top of that, she can still manage to laugh after doing that!!! OMG!!! REALLY FEEL LIKE GIVING HER A BIG SLAP!!! (or throw her down the building, since my car is parked on the 4th floor..hehe.. evil me .. :P)
Backache came back for an attack on me today, made me unable to stand long..sadly.. and after went for dinner, stepped into a pile of red ants .... gosh .. am still having itch all over my body now.. And that ignorant lady, wanna go home, but want ppl to fetch, and don't wanna ask for ppl's favor.. what is she trying to proof?? asking the assistant manager to come to talk to me and ask me to give her a lift.. cant she ask by herself? Got no mouth to speak? GOSH!!!!
Ended the working time with a bad situation as well .. Am not sure where am i heading, so took out my phone to on my GPS System. Police came out of no where and stopped me, and issued me a summon..
Well, can conclude that it isn't a good day after all, except that, HEY, i got my ear pierced today.. the 1 good thing that happen today despite all the bad news.. HEHE!!
But nevertheless, am looking forward to tomorrow. For the sun has to set and prepare for tomorrow so that we can enjoy a brand new day with its new mysteries and adventures for us. :)
Signing off ... |
| posted by Billyism @ 7:40 AM |
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| Aftermath .... |
| Saturday, June 13, 2009 |
Went to IOI Mall today .. wanted to get the cross and necklace to be put in my car ...
Sadly it has been sold off ... but its okay .. will continue to look for it .. :)
Had a wonderful chat with chelle early this morning ...
Haha .. tks for keeping me company, my dear beloved 'daughter' .. :P
1st things 1st .. well had a normal day today ..
After chatting with chelle, i went back to sleep, only to wake up after 5pm .. LOLZ
Skipped breakfast and lunch .. only had dinner over in IOI Mall, in a shop called "Next Stop". The food are quite okay though .. understood that it is owned by the pastor from the Eagle Point Church .. hmm .. not bad not bad ... hahaha ...
I had Home made pork rice, barney had dried curry pork rice, which was real wet .. instead of dried .. haha .. and jer had sausage fried rice .. enjoyed our food and drinks .. haha .. finally had my strawberry milk pearl tea ... fuh .. after so long .. :P
Went for some window shopping and saw quite a few things i wanted. Well, in God's time .. lets not rush things .. hehe .. real tight budget now ...
Came back, and continued to play with Barn Buddy and Restaurant City in Facebook ..
HAHA.. checked on my pet society too as i grew some plants in my gardens .. hehe ..
How i wish my house is as big as the 1 in my pet society .. LOLZ!! though i may not need such big house after all .. :P
Alright, gtg and bathe ... til then ... signing off ..
-outz- |
| posted by Billyism @ 7:55 AM |
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| Blurness |
| Friday, June 12, 2009 |
Feeling tired and blur, though i did nothing ...
Haven't been sleeping well, due to all the nightmares..
End of the world .. end of my life ...
All things seem so real .. though i know its just a dream ...
Are those just dreams, or are they visions of future?
Don't really know if it is just a dream ..
Am really blur with all this..
All i know now is that am really weak and lost ..
Don't know what i can do to stop it..
Backache is slowly sliding off .. feeling much comfort after almost a week having it..
Spinning head and pounding chest pain is still around though ..
Cough also seem to be still bad ..
Eyes are still seeing things unseen to naked eyes ...
Friends, please continue to pray for me .. tks ..
Will do my best, and trust in the Lord that i will get well soon .. :)
-outz- |
| posted by Billyism @ 8:55 AM |
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| Life ... |
| Wednesday, June 10, 2009 |
Sometimes really don't know which disappoints us more .. Having these difficulties as your trials, or having your loved ones come telling you they're disappointed with you, because of what you're going thru.
I'm trying my best not to shake..but i need support too .. not someone coming to tell you i'm disappointed in / with you. Hurts real bad when you hear that from someone whom you think all this while cared bout you.
Nightmares still attack me no matter how much and how hard i tried. Losing focus makes me unable to work at all. Am now stuck at home not knowing what to do, besides blogging and praying that God will take all this from me, or if i were to go thru this, give me the strength and wisdom. For i am really weak and not knowing what else to do.
Hope i will be able to go thru it asap... am really tired and restless ...
-outz- |
| posted by Billyism @ 8:38 PM |
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| Life After Prophecy |
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12.29am. Life seems to be getting tougher .. Wonder if it is as Rodney said, that we're the red painted, high on the wanted list, marked by Mr. S.A. Tan. Everything I do can't seem to be in focus.
Ever since camp, life changed dramatically..
Started all on Saturday itself.. Having nightmares, from the fall of myself, to the destruction of the world .. Then when i went to work on Monday ... felt uncomfort on my body .. and the next day, had a terrible backache... hurting me til now...
After that, everything seems to being going wrongly.. can't go to work due to the aches.. what's worse, the cough that seem to be gone, came back .. and now, there's headaches and chest pains .. not forgetting the nightmares continues.
Knowing this is all a test from God, and a temptation from the satan to try bring me down, to sin.. i pray that God will give me strength to go thru this.. might not be easy.. but God is marvelous for He works in ways we cannot see, and true enough, He sees beyond what we can see.
To all my friends out there, please do keep me in your prayer. Certainly need lotsa prayers.
Thank you all in advance.
Billy signing outzzz.. |
| posted by Billyism @ 9:29 AM |
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| The Meetup |
| Monday, June 8, 2009 |
9.35 Arrived at Asia Cafe, looking for parking and saw Jason there waiting for a girl. lolz.. wondering if the girl was in the band too. Not long after that found a parking and went down to meet them up. When arrived, Jason told me that out of the other 5 more band members, only 1 more will be coming .. which is the bassist, named Andy. I was like, huh? really? its so LOLZ!!
But, nevertheless, met up with Andy later and we had a long chat till we did notice the time. haha ... found out that Andy went for the Estrange's audition for bassist. Though he did not manage to get into it but was still, fun man, getting a chance to jam with the band ... hahaha ...
We talked craps from guitars, to guitarists and bassist.. finally to ghost a.k.a. spooky stories .. hahaha ... Andy was sharing bout his experience seeing a white shadow near his condo while he was looking for parking, after coming home 'early' at 3am.. lolz .. and also that his brother, who waited for the lift from the carpark to their condo.. there was a guy who was in front of his brother .. but as he entered the lift, that guy vanished into thin air ....
After that, wow .. we all decided to stop the story and realized that its already 12.20.. lolz .. so we called it a 'day' and went on separate ways .. since the 3 of us stays in different areas .. haha ..
A quick topic bout Li Ching.. well, a fun girl to mix with .. haha .. though she kept on looking at the owner of pasta azzuri ... hahaha ..
alright ... am out now .. check in laterzz ... :P |
| posted by Billyism @ 10:24 PM |
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| Night Fall |
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8.46pm. Know not what to do. Was doing design for my namecard, ended up can't see clearly also though it was nice. Wondering should i actually change or stick to it. But then to think of it, sticking to the current design ain't gonna get me anywhere though since this can't really be read. How can i print something ppl can't see or read? LOLZ!!
Well, had dinner in Baba Low's with loved one and Barney. Though the food ain't that good anymore as compared to before, well, i would say it is still human. haha.
Will be going out to meet up with friends, or rather should i say, friend, and his friends, as we're gathering to have our 1st band meet up session .. lolz .. wondering who will be in the band and hopefully won't go playing some crazy heavy metal rock songs i guess, since we're gonna be a christian band ... hehehe ....
Though today has been my 1st day of working after camp, i know that my Lord shall provide all my needs and He will watch over me. need not to worry bout anything, but to serve Him and He alone.
I thank god for this gracious and wonderful day i had. Can't wait til tomorrow. For someone once said, the sun has to set to prepare us for tomorrow. So don't be sad that today is over, but be joyful as there will be a new tomorrow. hehe... (learn that from the anime Blood +... LOLZ!!!)
Alright peeps, see ya later to update on the meeting... am leaving now to meet up ... hehehe ...
-outz- |
| posted by Billyism @ 5:45 AM |
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| Life At Work After Camp.LOLZ! |
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Well, am indeed thankful that am working. Though the day has not been going according to what i expected, but am happy with my day.
Of course, i got nothing today, but learnt a valuable lesson, nothing comes unpaid.lolz. At least thank God that i am still living, by His grace i can still be here enjoying my life.:) |
| posted by Billyism @ 4:24 AM |
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| Thought For Life |
| Sunday, June 7, 2009 |
| Everyday, we go thru circumstances or challenges in life. Many ppl find it hard to cope with it. I myself struggled. However am glad today's message was a good wake up call for me .. hehe .. though i have to admit i was not really listening.
The speaker said that, he had a dream, and in his dream was the story of Peter walking on water towards Lord Jesus. The speaker was there too in the boat and called out to Jesus, "Lord, if that is really you, call me too, i want to walk to you." True enough, Lord Jesus called him. As he steps out of the boat, he felt so happy and start running and skidding around, happily. After a moment, he noticed that Peter and Jesus was already on the boat, and everyone on board was looking at him. Lord Jesus spoke to him, "Elvin, what are you doing? Do you know that you are actually wasting my time?"
When i heard that, i was stunned. I was, or should i say, am still in this situation. Taking things that Lord has given to me for granted. Having my own sweet time in everything that i do. I know that this is 1 of the key areas i should change, and be focus once again on what i should do. Thank you Lord for reminding me. Bless me i pray ... :) |
| posted by Billyism @ 8:34 AM |
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| HCC Church Camp 2009 |
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| Well, update on it .. since i've started blogging .. no harm doing it right? hehe ..
Am truly blessed in this camp. Learn alot, doubts cleared, and definitely am looking forward to the change.
What can i say? This is the best camp i ever been. I remember when Rev. Samson Dabbas came to pray for me, 3 things he asked and told me :-
1. Why are you confuse? (wasn't my fault okay? you were praying for an uncle, then suddenly came to me and ask me such a question. LOLZ!!)
2. When are you getting married? (wow .. was stunned when i heard that. HAHA!!)
3. Go and fulfill your destiny. (errr .. mind telling me what is it? wait wait .... argh!! He blew and i collapsed... LOL!!!)
Well, am still praying and asking God to reveal my destiny to me. Am still wondering since i had so many things up in my mind, like, am i gonna continue in this job? or am i going into the band with my friends, or do i have to leave everything behind and go full time?
Have not forget bout that yet, that's for sure .. haha .. though i kept telling Him no, i am not ready yet to go full time ... hahaha ...
Well, that's all for now folks .. check in laterzzz ... :P |
| posted by Billyism @ 7:06 AM |
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| The Beginning |
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| Hi folks, greetings from Billyism...
Haha .. its been so long since i last blog ... let see if i can still blog .. :P Hope to see ppl around and would definitely love to receive your comments ya ... :) |
| posted by Billyism @ 4:48 AM |
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| About Me |
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Name: Billyism
Home: Klang, Selangor, Malaysia
About Me: crazy, fun, tough, what else ... hmmm ... loves God truly madly deeply ... :P what can i say .. He's my Creator after all . hehe ..
See my complete profile
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